Nero? As In Nero7? Septimus? Where you not killed during the raid? I read you got tortured and killed by your own out of mercy.

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What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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What did the doctor say to his patient with cancer? "You have cancer...".

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What did the Japanese man do to the pizza? He ate it.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

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what do you call a black guy african american

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why was 6 afraid of 7? Because ever since 3 died, 7 had changed. He had turned aggressive and randomly snapped and hit out at some of the other numbers for no apparent reason.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cause 7 was a petophile and 6 has four children

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Why did the plane crash? Because its pilot was a loaf of bread

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Knock knock who's there? the police, your under arrest the police your under arrest who? BAM! sir, I'm placing you under arrest for the murder of your wife, anything you say or do can be used against you. IT WASN'T ME!!!! yeah yeah tell it the judge

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Parents are very similar to trees. They fall over when hit repeatedly with an ax.

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What is worse than getting hit by a car? Getting hit by a truck

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I´ll give anything to be screw by you.

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What's the square root of yo mama? That which when multiplied by itself equals yo mama.

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The president is invited to a party at Bill's house. Suddenly the house catches on fire. Who survived? No one, they all died.

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What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

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Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

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so three men walk into a bar and one is a priest.

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why did Suzie fall off the swing? because she had no arms.... well then knock knock! whis there? suzie. suzie who? she doesnt know either...she has no arms!

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What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "I'm Japanese". The guy at the counter says "What a coincidence! I am Japanese too." He gets seated and the guy next to him says, "I'm Japanese too." The bar is in Japan.

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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