- Anti Joke

Q. How do you make your dog stop barking? A. Take it to the grocery store. Replace it with any popsicle in the fridge.

Why did the guy jump out of the plane? he was parachuting

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She was dead.

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

What did the mental patient say to the apple? She didn't say anything because she was a catatonic schizophrenic.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

why ya gotta be so rude? cause i can

Why did the boy scratch his back? A:because it was itchy.

What did Hitler say to his wife? It's time to go start the Holocaust.

vitamin c

What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

what does a baby sound like in a microwave. i don't know i was masturbating

Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

Knock Knock. Who's There? A Banana. The middle aged man opened the door, prepared to distribute candy to the trick or treaters.

You know what they say about fat thumbs? They give a lot of accidental comment likes on statuses.

Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

So a guy with no legs and no arms is on his death bed. He asks to sky dive one time before he dies.

What did the cancer patient say to the other cancer patient? Nothing, he was dead.

what goes round , and round , and croaks? a blender in a frog.

What happened when the engineering student studied for a physics final? They failed.

Y did the boy fall down the stairs???? He was In a wheel chair

So Helen Keller walks into a bar...

How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.