One day in school two kids had a conversation. Susan: What do you want to do when your older? Oliver: I want to go to the moon. Susan: Oh. I went there last week. Oliver: Can you smell something. Susan: Haven't you ever been to Pennsylvania.

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;iub

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Whatever you like, it can't hear you.

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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A small boy is playing on the sidewalk. Then, he is approached by a black van. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away. Then, the man driving the van says, "So, how was your day, son?"

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What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

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why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

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your mom is so annoying that she has no freinds and lives alone crying every night about how her children abandoned her

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How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

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Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

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a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

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Why did the chair break? The person that sat in it was over weight

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

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A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

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What did the blind quadriplegic get for Christmas? Cancer.

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How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

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Don't make my new Nazi friend upset, or he'll be Fuhrerious

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Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

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Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

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My dog got out of its cage So I found it and beat the shit out of my neighbors kid.

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What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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