Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms

What do you call a person with no eyes, ears, or mouth? Helen Keller

save me from the nothing ive become

What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

Hey, have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. Neither has he.

The bartender says "We don't serve time travellers here". Two time travellers walk into a bar.

Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

knock knock whose there? suck my a s s barf

Why Do Black People Love Watermelon? Because Its A Delicious Fruit.

Whats worse than one dead guy? 2 dead guys

Why was the boy sad The boy wanted a puppy for his Birthday So his parents got him a Toy dog Later that year he was found dead with the Toy Dog shoved down his mouth gagging him.

what happened when u got some swag? i don't know u still don't have any

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

When life throws you lemons, duck cuz they freakin' hurt

There was a brunette, a blonde and a red head, They were all great friends!

What's the difference between an apple? An red fox's enzyme defragmenting on tue.

I would very much love to meet you again Erron, call me sometime I do not care how you get my number.

Why did the guy have one shoe? Because he took one shoe off at a time

What did your mother say after I beat her? Nothing, because she was dead.

Knock Knock, Who's There? Legolas They're taking the Hobbits to Isengard!

A guy walks into a bar and says ouch.

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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