In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what did the window say to the other window nothing they are both inanimate objects

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Whoever said "don't start what you can't finish" hopefully didn't think about having kids Cuz that would be horror Get it?

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Roses are red, Violets are violet They are not blue You stupid twat

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Whats green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? obviously quite a lot due to the fact that they are two completely different ideas with little to no relation to each other.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did the donkey cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? Heehaw!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why was Martha put in a wheelchair? She was hit by a rabid cabbage.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

PhilosopherCon: "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?"

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Roses are red violets are blue I have herpees.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's the difference between a pessimist and a magnet? One is made of flesh and can talk, think and do things. The other is made of metal and can only pull things towards itself or push them away. But strangely, the latter is a lot more welcome in most situations.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Knock Knock. Who's there? (Knocker runs for his life).

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Knock knock Who's there? Benjamin Benjamin who? Benjamin Dover Ben! I'm so glad you're home the kids have missed you so much!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I used to get on Facebook, then someone asked me to save a child in Africa by liking a picture of Jesus or ignore it and go to hell

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A tree falls over on an old woman. Mysteriously, the woman lifts the tree up and walks away. A man is amazed by this, so he goes and asks the woman how she managed to lift the whole tree. She tells the man that he is an idiot an walks away. Later inspecting the tree, he realizes it is a small sapling weighing no less than 10 pounds

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Do you like cheese? Yes. Okay.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

A duck walks into a bar. A horse walks into a bar. A cow walks into a bar. A bear walks into a bar. The owner tells them to get out, but they can't understand humans. So they just stayed there.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Do you feel lucky punk, well do ya? ..Umm i'm sorry :/ I'm not gay!... I'm into chicks...you know?!

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Justin

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops