what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

Your mom is so fat, she is having angioplasty. She might need a ride a home.

What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind.

Casey Anthony kills a baby

What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

What`s red and smells like blue paint? A sunburned baby drinking green paint.

What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

Pineapples have a smaller volume than the sun

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

a pope and a catholic priest walk into a bar... the priest orders... then the pope says to the bartender "I'll have what hes having." so the bartender takes out a small child and says ...."are you sure?"

Why did the boy fall off the zipline? He had no arms.

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a tire swing? A: I don't have a tire swing hanging in my backyard.

Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

What did the kid say to the ginger? You're gay.

Why do black people like kool aid? Why It is a very hydrating and delicious drink

Two scientists walk into a bar The first says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O, too.” Both of them receive water because the bartender is not irresponsible enough to serve concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse becomes depressed. He didn't ask to look like this. He drinks himself into a stupor, and then crashes into another car on the highway on the way home, killing a family of five. The horse is now in jail for life.

What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing they're rocks? What did the tree say to the other tree? Nothing they're both trees? What did the pillow say to the other pillow? Nothing they're both pillows? What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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