Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

What's brown and sticky? The stuff that comes out of your anus

A blind man walks into a bar... And a table. And a chair.

a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a tire swing? A: I don't have a tire swing hanging in my backyard.

How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? One.

why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

What did the boy call the man that kicked the cat? "Sad twat"

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Bees inside of your eyeballs.

Your mom is so fat, she is having angioplasty. She might need a ride a home.

my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

How do you make a mailman cry? Kill his family.

what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

Three men are all in a car park and they all want the same parking spot. As it turns out, it was a trolley bay

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

Roses are red Violets are blue I like you Get in the van

whats worse than a worm in your apple? the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust? two worms in your apple

Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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