If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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Stranger at door: *Knock knock* Oliver Twist: Who's there? Stranger at door: Not your parents.

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What sinks quickly to the bottom of a river? Your dead parents.

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What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

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What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

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What do you call a lazy good-for-nothing who can't succed at anything, steals your money, and who is unskilled in every way? A women

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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Dani Barton is not that! She is a great girl with a strong heart and feelings. The statement below is a joke, hence why it was published on AntiJokes. This is NOT a joke however.

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What did the doctor say to the young boy? We only planned on a annual checkup but have discovered that your and aids baby and only have 3 days to live. Tell your family members goodbye you'll be on life support in the next couple hours.

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Why did Kelly lose all interest in men? An aneurysm in her brain popped

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what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a rapist.

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Why was the Chinese Man mistaken for the other Chinese Man? They were twins.

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Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

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A girl asked for lip balm. She put some on and her lips exploded.

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What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

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Why did the black man buy ten packets of Kool-Aid at the supermarket? Because it is a refreshing beverage that many individuals enjoy drinking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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