whats 69+2? 71

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whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

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hi

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What color is the white cup? It's blue because it has two handles.

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Whats worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings Whats worse than 2 bee stings? A car crash Whats worse than a car crash? 3 bee stings

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yo mumma is so smelly i can distictly smell her more than her perfume

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Whats worse than burning your foot? Getting it eaten off by a cannibal.

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How do you say vampire in spanish? Vampiro.

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Q: What's DNA? A: The National Dyslexic Assosiation.

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What do you call a cat that growls? A cat

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One Direction???? Gifted singers???? HA HA HA

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Covert trance, black Ops, and something I kinda made up myself. The first two are basically using suggestions without the victim being aware of it, that is how that famous bank robber that just asks nicely for all the cash and gets it succeeds. The other is tricking the "allmighty" subconcious and again, my own invention people claim its called "this and that", I know, because I coined most of the terms. Anyway, you put people into a deep state of trance, you tell them to take a step forward into the sea, and well, you actually led them down the top of a skyscraper or something fun... "Now... Suck on the lollipop I have between my, okay ill stop"

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A man with no arms and no legs

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What did the black college graduate say to the Jewish high school dropout? Do you want me to also clean your fourth floor executive bathroom, Mr. Bernstein?

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Religious fanatics: WE MUST NOT SIN! Jesus: And I died for their sins? They do not even try a bit of sex and rock and roll? Now that is a sin :( I died for nothing then :( Religious fanatics: Damn!

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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What's the difference between a baby and a textbook? You throw a textbook at the wall with TWO hands.

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My son lost his first tooth today...so proud. Took my punch like a champ

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You really can't, but you could grab it and shake it around so it looks like its dancing.

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Women's rights

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Q: What do you get when you cross an Elephant and a Rhinoceros? A: Merriam-Webster defines "cross" as "an affliction that tries one's virtue, steadfastness, or patience." This comedic exercise is one such affliction.

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women's rights

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What's worse than a cow on the ceiling? - two cows on the ceiling.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops