Why was the blonde in the bathroom for 2 hours. She had to pee really bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the mentally disabled child begin to cry? Because he shit himself

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you make a clown sad? Rape his wife, choke his grandma and send him a video of you setting his children on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: Why did the fork cross the balloon? A: Apples

thumb_up thumb_down -15

hi

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a black man with an afro? Whatever his name happens to be.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: Why did the duck eat some grass? A: because we are so careless that we caused global causing the entire pond to shrink to a size where it cannot raise a family and the fish could not prosper so the duck could not eat what it had forcing it do consume an inedible substence causing it to die because is not a natural part of a ducks diet

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's funnier than seeing a baby falling from the empire state building? Stopping his speed with a shovel

thumb_up thumb_down -15

There were once three bears who lived in a cottage in the forest. They left to go to the market one day. While they were gone a blonde girl walked into their cabin. Meanwhile at the market, everyone was freaking out that there were bears there.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why didn't the baby learn to walk? It got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock knock Who's there? Tom Tom who? Tom Rodgers I don't know you Tom decides to leave the house because the person in the house does not recognize him

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was the man sad? Because he found his 80 year old mother had been raped and murdered in her home...

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you confuse a blonde? The same way you confuse a brunette or redhead, hair color has nothing to do with an individual's intelligence.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q.What has flashing lights and really bad dancing A.Baby haveing an eppilectic fit

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did Lois say to Peter? Who cares... Family Guy is a stupid show.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Depends how you look at it, I like some girl, she and that girl gets along, I get along with the two girls, and yeah, I make them fight to the death as I consume the weakest one and make the new one my wife of darkness! Well, actually, threesomes, but NEVAH, NEVAR!! *shakes fist towards the skies* with another man! Now if my waifu wants to have some fun with a girl, I say why not (and then she asks if I want to join always so far), its genetics, you know, each caveman had like 600 wivus and he did not have time to bang them all, now let those genes go trough MAN for a couple of millenia, and he becomes the KING OF DEMONS... ME! Those other scumbags are a whole other story. Oh, and the 600 wivus did either go without sexytime, or you know... I mean you do KNOW that women are like comfortable naked together and yeah...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

one day i went on a swing, somone pushed me and i fell broke my leg,cracked three ribs, cut my lip, fractured my toe and died of internal bleeding to my brain.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q. What is a similarly between Jewa and Pizza. A. There both baked in a over

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why was six afraid of seven? because seven was a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Did you hear about the human cannonball who lost his job? Circus attendance is on the decline, as people are spending less money on entertainment, due to a slow economy and poor consumer confidence. Because the circus owners paid him under the table, he did not qualify for unemployment and was force to take a job at Hardies. He has a drinking problem and suffers from depression.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did the kid let go of his kite? He got struck by lightning

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops