Why didnt little timmy have a pencil? He was poor

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The Earth is a nice place to live.

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What did Dr. Pepper say to Sprite? I'm a Doctor.

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What's the difference between a bird and a fish ? They're both different, except the fish.

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What did the homicidal maniac say to his 13th victim? Nothing, she was dead at the time.

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"What's uhhh.". "Crap I forget" "Oh yeah! 32!"

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Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

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what is red and lies on the floor? the boy that jumped out of the plane

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Why didn't Susie's dad come home on time? He was dragged into a dark alley, then stabbed in the eye. When his body was found 2 days later, Susie couldnt stand the loss and hung herself the day after her father was found.

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what is similar between a mexican and a bench? they are both illeageal. except the bench

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Were both dogs!

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Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

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Q. What has four legs, but can't walk? A. A dog dying of a serious illness...

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"Honey im home!" but his honey was dead on the floor along with his 3 kids.

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How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

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Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

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two men are sitting in a desk next to each other learning math when the equation 22+1 came up. the frist man says to the second, "24" and they both giggled. the second guy then slips his lips over the the first guy and whispers, "hey, i just thought of something funnier than 24" to which the first replies with a slight of laughter, "lemme hear it." so the second says with laughter "25".

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How does a black chick tell if she's pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out, all the cotton is already picked.

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Asians

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What did the sheep say when he broke a leg? Nothing, sheeps can't talk.

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Whats the difference between a jewish man wearing a fedora and glass of almond milk? Ones a glass of almond milk.

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A duck walks into a bar.... Duck: Can I have a glass of water? Bartender: How would you like to pay for it? Duck: Put it on my bill

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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