What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - Could you please take a look at my neck it has been hurting there for several weeks now.

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What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Oama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

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Why did danielle drop her ice cream cone? Because she was diabetic and had a blood sugar of 5.

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Why is it that we don't eat clowns? Because in most Western countries cannibalism is illegal.

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A man took a police officers gun and threw it at a baby in a stroller. He went to jail.

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How do you get a clown off a swing set? You throw an axe at his head when he's not looking.

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What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

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What did the fan of Justin Beiber say? Nothing there are no fans.

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What did the chicken say after crossing the road? Nothing.It's a f*cking chicken.

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Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

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whyd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side :)

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hi my name is matt mckeon and i like renata saggy tits !!!!!

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What do you get if you have a bundle of children's clothing, some moisturising cream, a gas mask, a lollipop, more candy and a bag? A disguise.

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And more;

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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A man scratches his ankle and says " my nuts are itchy" a woman looks at him questionly. realizing he had been watched, he lifted the bottom of his pant leg and showed to woman that he had stuffed his socks with pecans.

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Why did Billy cross the road? Because Billy wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

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there is a woman named shannen. she is happily married and has children.

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why do people copy other people's anti-jokes? because they don't have a life nor an imagination. P.S. if this gets a lot of thumbs ups, expect another one soon from one of those people who copy others anti-jokes...

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Two cannibals were eating a clown. Good.

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Two pretzels were walking down the street. One was assaulted. The other, witnessing what he'd seen, developed a harsh stereotype.

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Why did the Kitty stop meowing? Because its dead.

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "It sure is hot in here." The other muffin says "Holy shit a talking muffin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops