What's worse than getting stabbed Getting stabbed two times

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what hurts more than a stab wound? two stab wounds

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what looks like a sock and goes on peoples feet? A sock

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt

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What did George Washingtn say to is men before crossing the Delaware? Men, get in the boat.

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Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

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you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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Why didnt your daughter come home? The door was locked

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whats better than sex with a 12 year old?? nothing

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What do you call a mulsim that tattles on you for vandilising muslim propaganda Target Practice

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How did the young child react when a bullet went through his head? He fell to the ground and his heart stopped beating.

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What did the black man say to the other black man. We're both niggas.

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What's black and fun to hang from trees? Tire swings.

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Roses are gray Violets are gray ROFL I'm a dog

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What did the mental patient say to the apple? Hi, my name is Chris.

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What did the starving kid say to the starving parent? Pineapple

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kknocckkck knockckkckccck hue's theeeair? TTThhe pOOOliCCee. fffor whaaa? yyouu rr arreesstedd forrr drrunkkkc dddrivvinnng! Puuut urerre frreaakkki'n hannnddss uppp!

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

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If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

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A man is flailing his arms in the ocean. Help me, I'm drowning!, he screams. Some dude runs into the water, drags the man out, and is proclaimed a Hero.

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Knock knock Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? ..He died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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