Two muffins are in the oven, One says "Damn it, so hot in here," The other one says " Wow! Muffin which can talk!"

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A worm slowly crawled through the ground, only to be eaten by an incoming bird.

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what do obama and terrorist have in common -they are both human

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What's worse than having a mouth full of molars? A pole through your chest.

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What did Helen Keller say when she jumped off the cliff? ........………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………..................................................................... .

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Why did blink-182 get a record deal? Because they play quality punk rock.

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When you cross a bird on the sidewalk what do you do??? Run in big circles.

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If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

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My friend died by getting shot in the head. But he respawned back at his checkpoint.

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whats up fuch you bitch

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What's cold, limp, approximately 65 pounds, and being dragged out of that pool with no safety fence over there? Not important, lets go get some Wendy's man.

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Whats the difference between Amanda and Brittaney spears? Nothing, they are both worthless sluts

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If three men were rowing a rowboat backwards across your front lawn, and six of the four back wheels fell off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? 17 because footballs don't have feathers.

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knock knock who's there me i kill you

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What do a fish and a moose have in common? They both live under water, apart from the moose.

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Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

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Knock knock Who's there? Illiteracy.

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender? A: None. It is a sick and depraved act that is probably illegal anyway.

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What did the indian man say to the black man? "Hi."

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Why did the black man jump off the cliff? He was in a spiraling depression due to recently being laid off at work, his troubled home life, and the recent death of his sister.

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

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What do you get when you eat all potatoes Their all gone

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People say the sky's the limit................................ but there's footprints on the moon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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