What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

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Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

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Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

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Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

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Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours Stolen propety....

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What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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Why did the prince kiss his beloved just before going into battle? Intermission.

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Do you know why the Mexican didn't like hot dogs? I don't know either.

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A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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Whats worse than losing your entire family in a car accident? Luikimia

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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