What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What happened to the lady? She queefed.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

how many flys in a box six --sticksack

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats brown and sticky? Doody

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the rich white student to the poor arabian teacher? good morning Mr.Stevenson.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No.. Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops