Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

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Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

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question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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Denard Robinson

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A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

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A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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