Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

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while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

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The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

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What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

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Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

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Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

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What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

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A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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