What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

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Want to hear a joke? ... Oh dear, I can't think of any. Golly, this is embarrassing.

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What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Yo mamma is so ugly, but your father was willing to look past that. They fell in love and you were born about a year after they got married.

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Moon: The sun shines bright like a virgin. He must be high..

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What's worse than carrying a heavy suitcase? Poisoning children.

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What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

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What does a ghost get when he watches porn? A boner

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What goes up and down, up and down, up and down, forever? An insult to Newtonian physics.

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What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

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Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

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Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

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Why did the fat Jew cross the road? To go to the bicycle shop to fix his puncture

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Two Muffins are in a freezer. The first muffin says "Sure is cold in here." The other muffin sits there untill at a later date eaten because muffins can't talk. The first muffin later is analyzed and dysected by the United States governmant and is classified as alien because again, muffins can't talk.

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Wright flyer

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what did the homeless man get for christmas hyperthermia

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A seal walks into a club. The man proceeds to skin it and sell the fur for profit.

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Whats bad about being a black jew? You have to sit in the back on the oven.............

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Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

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Sam alexander is also r8 g4y

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An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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