What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

What's worse than dieing? Not much.

What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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