How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

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what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

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What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigga

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you know what time it is? Because I don't wanna be late for class and if you told the time, it will surely help me because I'll be able to arrive early at my class not to mention it would greatly improve my punctuality efforts to help me pass the class this semester. Geez, I remember back in middle school there was a guy name Billy Jones and he used to always be late for class. His name was Billy but we called him Bill. Bill was his nickname but his real name was Billy. Anyways, he was always late for class because he would always make the best barbecue ribs in town.... (45 minutes later...) ....and I told Bill, "Man, if you were to just ask what time it was it would greatly help you in arriving to class early." And he was was like "I know but..."And then I cut him off and I said "But nothing. I don't care what kind of barbecue ribs you make, you just can't do that." So there I was, me and him, sitting down and .... (3 hours later...) ...it was awesome. Boy, I remember back in the early 90's when I was at elementary school, it was a stormy weather and we had to go to class. That's when I met Clarissa. She was a really nice girl and I remember there was a time when... (to be continued....)

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What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

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what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

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If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

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What do you call a black man in a hole? "sir". He is A colnel in the US marines fighting for his country in a pivotal battle to maintain american interests in other countries.

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knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

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So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

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Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? Because the numerous failed attempts of crossing over the years deemed it almost impossible, therefore, chicken could no longer see the point in life.

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What did the man say after he was shot? Nothing, because the bullet hit the man with so much impact that he instantly died and was unable to talk at the current time. Others in the surrounding area walked by as if nothing was there.

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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You might be a redneck if you hate your father and you live in a trailer

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what did the apple say to the orange ? nothing, apples are a fruit and do not have any organs which allow it to be able to talk.

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What's worse than a bee sting? The holocaust What's worse then the holocaust? Two bee stings

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What's worse than killing 6,000,000 Jews? Killing 6,000,001.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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