There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

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One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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What animal wouldn't you want to play games with? Probably none of them. They are animals and incapable of playing board games.

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Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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What did the Jew say when he walked into a bar? Ouch!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Me either. Well, later. Later.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

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Say you are caught in a net with 10 other people in said net at a construction site. A pair of scissors are right next to you and everyone said to use the scissors. But instead of using the scissors, you use your teeth in risk of a broken tooth.

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how do you get a scouters power level to 9,000? power levels dont exist in real life therefore cannot reach 9,000

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Why so serious ?

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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What page are you on The gay page.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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There was an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman. Now there's millions of them. And women too.

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Why did nobody like Anne? She was disabled

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What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

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if you're jesus and you know it, clap your hands

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what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops