Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

Andoni was here

What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

Did you hear why the peanut got arrested by walking next to another peanut? One got a-salt-ed

Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

don't do anything i wouldn't do first

How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

What did God say to Adam and Eve? Be fruitful

Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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