What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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What's the difference between the Hulk and the Thing? One's green.

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Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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What is Sally's favorite flavor ice cream? She can't eat ice cream, she's lacktose and tollerant.

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Ask me if I'm a car. Are you a car¿ Yes¡

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Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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L.A Clippers 2000-2012 season!!!!

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you know what time it is? Because I don't wanna be late for class and if you told the time, it will surely help me because I'll be able to arrive early at my class not to mention it would greatly improve my punctuality efforts to help me pass the class this semester. Geez, I remember back in middle school there was a guy name Billy Jones and he used to always be late for class. His name was Billy but we called him Bill. Bill was his nickname but his real name was Billy. Anyways, he was always late for class because he would always make the best barbecue ribs in town.... (45 minutes later...) ....and I told Bill, "Man, if you were to just ask what time it was it would greatly help you in arriving to class early." And he was was like "I know but..."And then I cut him off and I said "But nothing. I don't care what kind of barbecue ribs you make, you just can't do that." So there I was, me and him, sitting down and .... (3 hours later...) ...it was awesome. Boy, I remember back in the early 90's when I was at elementary school, it was a stormy weather and we had to go to class. That's when I met Clarissa. She was a really nice girl and I remember there was a time when... (to be continued....)

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Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

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Chris is hairy

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How did the hairless cat braid its hair? It didn't, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs.

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Fat? Jesse Z

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What do you all a black person on the moon? An Astronaut

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What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

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My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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Q: a man in a camry runs over his wife. who's fault is it? A: toyota and their breaks.

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay boys house. Knock knock! whose there? The chicken!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops