9/11 my birthday

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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How do you offend a black person? Call him a nigger.

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Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have your test results, You have cancer.

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When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

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Q: Why was the chicken waterboarded? A: Because the guy liked being cruel to animals.

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+funny&hl=en&safe=active&biw=1024&bih=398&gbv=2&tbm=isch&tbnid=lc8_fNCatYHOqM:&imgrefurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/harry-being-typical-harry/&docid=86Gw8eNJ73tOYM&imgurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/cms/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/harry-styles-300.jpg&w=300&h=400&ei=q4vHT9XwHYL48gSJoJzJDw&zoom=1

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roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

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Gustavo Andrade

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

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Why did the catholic preist take all the little boys out in the woods? They were going on a camping trip.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

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A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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