Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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What is my name? I dont know

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

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Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

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How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. At least that's what I've heard, I'm blind.

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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