What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

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Whats long and black and goes around corners? The unemployment line.

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There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

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What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

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What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cancer

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Women's Rights

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What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

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What's the difference between a prostitute and your mom? Your mom is a well educated lawyer who earns half a million dollar a year while the prostitute sells her own body for an extremely small amount of money.

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A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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So two people have conversation Luke: Hi Logan: Hi Snake eyes: ALHSKjagjdaoggj;jdjg;aj;kaj'dgajd Luke: You are so smart! (you retarted piece of poo) Logan: GAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBEEEEEEN

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What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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How do you make a baby stop crying for the rest of its life? Shoot it in the face.

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Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

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A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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