How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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What do the Irish do on their birthdays? Eat birthday cake and sing happy birthday

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Why Was the straight man in love ? because he was an intelligent human being who had the formula of understanding woman .

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Roses are potatoes Violets are potatoes I like potatoes Potatoes.

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

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Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

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What did the T Rex say to the pterodactyl? ROIRWR!!!

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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What happened to the Jewish child that used to live life like a normal kid? Him and his family were taken to a ditch and shot to death. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops