a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

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what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long face?'. The horse does not answer as it cannot speak or even understand english. It was later destroyed by the government.

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Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

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Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

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Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

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Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

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Why didn't the African kid eat lunch? He wasn't hungry.

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When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

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knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

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pull my finger (farts)

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What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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knock knock come in

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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A redhead walks into a bar and goes to the restroom. She needed to pee.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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