What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

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In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

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A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They all say ouch and then continue walking. Although the minister did hit it at a higher speed and ended up with a black eye.

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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Knock Knock Who's there? You You Who? Yes? Can I help you madam?

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

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What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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