Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your balls with a Jew.

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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so theres a plane, inside the plane are 500 solid bricks one falls out, how many are left? 499 What are the three steps to putting an elephant into a refrigirator? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, close the fridge. What are the four steps to putting a dear in the fridge? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer and then shut the fridge. It's Simba's birthday, what animal isn't there? The deer. its still in the fridge. a lady is walking across a street, she suddenly falls to the ground why? Because the brick hit her in the face. (:

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

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A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

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What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

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What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

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Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

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Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

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A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

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What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops