Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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What did the librarian say at the heavy metal concert? Shhhhh

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

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Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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When a fat lady walks by what do u think? R u fat or pregnant

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Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Why did the old man cross the road? Coz he was in an ambulance

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Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

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Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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A horse walks in to a bar. The barman says: "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse and can neither speak nor understand English. The horse is startled by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on it's way out.

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

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What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

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Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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