Robin get in the batmobile!

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Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

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In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill jail brake

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Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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How babies can you fit in a car seat? 1

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What would you call the flinstones if they were black? Ni**gers

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Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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What's worse than getting no presents for Christmas? Ass-rape!

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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Some potential names for Justin Beiber's next album: Headache Wailing and Screaming Eardrum Rapist Anger Half Price Indescribable Out of Print April Fools The Sounds of Hell Torture Ear Basher

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Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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Why did the gay man buy a prius? because it is a very fuel efficient car and will save him a lot of money of gas

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What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

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A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

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When life throws knives at you, run away.

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What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

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what do eagles and chetos have in common....... they both can fly except for the chetos

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Whats the difference between a monkey and another monkey? I dont know google it!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops