Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

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i saw amango it splootered

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When life gives you lemons, That's physically impossible. Life cannot physically hand you lemons.

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is pretty messed up!

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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Q: What do you call those assholes who always volunteer in lectures? A: Assholes. Fcuking assholes. They created the word asshole. Assholes

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

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Your mom is so stupid that she was unable to make it into the college of her choice.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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mary had a little lamb it's fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went it did a massive shit

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet. You're adopted.

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anti joke What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? RAPED.

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Reminding you of your religion. The army led by God attacked their foes at the mountains, yet had to flee because the enemy had plated steel wagons. Moral: Either God cant beat steel, or he was not there at all, its your call gents, because reading Ave Maria 50 times each time you sin, without reading the whole thing, does not even make you a Christian you FUCK (yes I can curse, you cannot)

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A man wearing dark sunglasses walks into a convenience store with a dog on a leash. He goes to the middle of the store, and he starts swinging the dog around over his head by the leash. The store clerk comes over and asks, "what are you doing?" The man replies, "Ajiohskdcojqpowuskncvlkzb" Not knowing what else to do, the clerk calls 911. It turns out the man's name is Ruprict, and he has escaped from the local mental institution. A police officer shortly arrives to bring Ruprict back to the hospital.

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What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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What is the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue.

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Why was the boy sad? His parents died in a horrible accient earlier that day.

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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