"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

hey its jerry hey its dj want to see my goat noooo

What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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