Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

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What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

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A man walks into a doctors office and waits for his turn. After his name was called he walked up to the doctor and told him that he kept having hallucinations. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic to help with the mans addiction to LSD.

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Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

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Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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civil rights

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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