What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

An orange walks into a bar....orange you glad I didn't say banana?!?!

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

What would it take to reunite the Beatles? Two more bullets.

It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

What did Sally get for chirstmas? Cancer

there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

I don't want to share my name yet if that is okay, I mean I have not seen you, but you have seen me just saying. Tell me how old you are first, I am 26, or 27, being more or less an orphan since birth details like that kinda lose themselves. And no, its not Eliza, I will wait for you here if you do not mind, there are still people that have thought I am Nero all this while, that`s what worries me, I doubt I can convince them I am chatting with myself this time around.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

Quarters look shiny, Brass beats Copper, Dish is better, So enjoy the hopper. DIrect TV, is forever alone. Kinda like you, when your on your phone!

Why do black guys always have sex on their mind? Because they are men.

why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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