A van drives into a car.

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Michael Jackson will always be remembered for touching...the hearts of many.

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What's the difference between a snake, and a lawyer? A snake cannot comprehend law, nor can one attend law school and set up an office. They are also different species.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

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What'd the mexican get for his birthday, birthday cards from his friends and family.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

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Edward Smith had started telling a long rambling joke when William McMaster Murdoch cut him off with "I don't like where this is headed".

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How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

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What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

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Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

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Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally! How did Sally die? She couldn't figure out how to open the fridge

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Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? No neither have I

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" After hearing this common expression, the horse looks up at the bartender. With this look, the bartender realizes that he has been speaking to I'll Have Another. Aware his faux pas, the bartender apologizes and pours him a free drink. The free drink does little for I'll Have Another's crushed dreams.

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why couldnt the boy get into the pirate movie? he was hit by a mexican telephone server.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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What did the mental patient say to the apple? She didn't say anything because she was a catatonic schizophrenic.

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why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

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Three men walk into a bar they suffer permanent brain damage, and completely lose their basic cognitive abilities. They will never be able to speak to one another again.

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What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Clause? Tiger Woods is a well-known golfer and Santa Clause is a mythical man who delivers presents to young children.

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What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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