Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

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Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

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Why are some people so barbaric? Because some people are German.

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

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Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

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Wilson: would you buy lottery when you grow up Mattuew: no theres no point Wilson: ask Xiangxi right next to you Mattuew: xiangxi, would you buy lottery if you grow up? Xiangxi: Prabably not, because the chance of winning a lottery is lower than becoming an astronaut Mattuew: the probability of you winning the lottery is higher than you finding a girlfriend

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A Mayor accidently killed one of the citizens of his town through dangerous driving. He could not be charged with murder, as it was an accident, but there was an uproar, and he was humiliated beyond question and forced out of office straight away. Even his family rejected him, owing to the fact that the unfortunate citizen he struck was his son's girlfriend.

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Why is my brother so bad at making anti jokes cuz HE HAS a sense of humor

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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One night, a man dreams that he is a bird that can fly into outer space. The next day the man finds out that his son is a homosexual.

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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