A man walks into a bar and then, after a relatively short period of time, walks out of the bar.

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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What happened when the boy got sad He fell in a woodchipper

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What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

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Why did the gay man sneek out of the brothel? Because he was ashamed of his well paying reception job

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how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

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A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

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What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

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A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

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What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

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What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the user is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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