An american family is picknicking on the bottom of the ocean. They are eating french fries, big mac's, chicken mc nuggets and drinking coca cola, some slurpies too, all purchased at the local mac donalds near lyndon blvd, in chevy chase near that weird house with the toothless lady that always smiles and then all of a sudden frowns at you, often wearing either a dark green or mint green dress. Spongebob squarepants comes drifting by dead in circular pants and little Sally, their youngest daughter asks a question, which cannot be heard because they're underwater.

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Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

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What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

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Q: What was the name of the armless elf in Snow White? A: Stumpy

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Why did the elderly lady cross the road? Because an atomic bomb was exploding behind her

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Baby you're so hot I have an erection the size of an average penis.

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I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

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A rooster lays an egg on top of a henhouse. Which way does the egg fall? Roosters don't lay eggs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

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What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

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whats the difference between a boyscout and a jew? boyscouts come home from camp

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Sure, I was not born yesterday, sounds serious, what is it?

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so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

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What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

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Why did the blonde lose her job as a teacher? Because she was in a sudden and violent car crash in which she died a slow agonizing death.

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what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

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Why did the chicken go to KFC? Because it was suicidal.

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roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

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What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

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hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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