Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "What'll it be?" The horse never replied.

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a jewish man walks into a wall with an erection. what hits first? his erection

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Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

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So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one does, too.

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. Come out with your hands up!

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Knock Knock Who's there? The holocaust

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Refrigerator

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

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Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

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When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. Well, life isn't a physical being so chances are low that it will actually hand you lemons.

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Jim: Why did the chicken cross the road? Bill: Why? Jim: To get to the other side! Bill: I don't get it Jim: It's an anti-joke, because you expect a punchline but there is no punchline, you get it? Bill: Hold on, let me tickle myself.......oh okay now I get it hahahahaha!

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

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Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

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How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the kangaroo fall over? Because it fell over the dead koala

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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