How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

Death by kayak

69.

there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

What did the irishman say when he walked into a bar? Ouch

What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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