An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

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Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

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Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

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I met a muslim girl the other day Shes the bomb

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No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

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Q: Why was the chicken waterboarded? A: Because the guy liked being cruel to animals.

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

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What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

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Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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Gustavo Andrade

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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