"What dosen't kill you makes you stronger" Except losing your arms.

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

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what better than getting an F on a test? getting an A on a test.

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What's worse than The Holocaust? CREED...

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My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Traffic was too backed-up so the chicken took a different route.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why do so many people enjoy these jokes. They are funny

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What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

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what do you call an anoying ginger? jimmy overby

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

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What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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What do you call a black drug dealer? A black man that works as a drug dealer

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops