Whats long hard and full of semen? A dick.

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Someone with a lame joke: What's black and white and red all over? Smart person who decides to mess with him: Nothing, if it is red all over how can it be black and white???????

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How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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What do you call justin bieber haveing sex with a lady? A dream

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

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Why did the man ask the woman on a date? They were both single and looking for a unique, romantic experience that could possibly turn into a long-term loving relationship.

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Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

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A man asks his friend "what's black, blue, and red all over?" He repiles, "Nothing, because I'm colorblind."

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? Black people don't celebrate Christmas.

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An Irishman, an American, an Australian, a Chinese man, a Turk, a Brazillian, a Canadian, a Jew, an African, a German, a Mexican, a Norweigian, a Swede, a Spaniard, a Russian and an Indian walk into a bar.

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what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

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your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it shows that she is overwhieght

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don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

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Why shouldn't you go to California? Because there are sharks there, obviously.

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A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

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Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

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How did the little boy with cancer run in his running race??? Very Well....

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Why were black people mad about slavery? Because they didn't get paid in gum! Holt9 ;P

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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