Q: What was the name of the armless elf in Snow White? A: Stumpy

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

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One morning a guilty man reluctantly told his wife he was having an affair. After a long awkward silence they were then abducted by aliens.

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You know what's cool? Yep.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream. Because he got hit by a bus

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Your mama is so fat, we are all seriously concerned about her health.

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What did the man do when he ran out of milk? He went to the store to get some more milk!

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What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

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A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guitar who? Violin.

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What did one skeleton say to the other? Nothing... Skeletons don't have vocal cords

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Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

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Knock-Knock Whos there? You You who? Yoohoo! is anybody home?!! Well obviously or i wouldn't have talked to you. Idiots these days!

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Why did the white girl become a lesbian? Because she was raped and had no more trust in the male gender.

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Why did I laugh at a joke? Cuz it was funny

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How old was the baby when it took its first steps? That question is impossible to answer due to the fact the parents had an abortion and the fetus remained unborn.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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