Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

What do you call a place where all hopes and dreams go to die as this place is contained of depression and the lingering smell of death? www.anti-joke.com

Uh... Justin, the most pointless man... I gotta cringe for a moment, I don't want to be mean here, but I think my body cell total opinion pool dropped a large quantity there, its not that I do not want you anymore, but, my body`s mass body cell total is kinda denying me... Actually I am denying IT... ACTUALLY WE ARE DENYING EACH OTHER, (which is totally awesome, united denial fighting against one another FOR DENYING THE MOST! BECAUSE COOPERATION IS FOR PUSSIES!) Anyway, hell I am dead tired, oh yeah, Justin... Man, Uh, who where you again?

a jew, a muslim and a christian all walk into a bar; because of the difference in religion im afraid such an event is unlikely to occur in the future.

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

A:Wanna hear a joke? B: Sure A: A joke

Baby Seal walks into a club.

Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause you touch yourself at night;

How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

Why did the black man bleed to death? He was stabbed, but he bled to death because his doctor had just prescribed him some blood-thinners for his serious headaches.

What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

Watch he thinks he can out wit me watch adams next joke it will suck sooooo bad

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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