A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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Why did the pirate have a peg leg? Diabetes

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In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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Why didn't the boy cross the road? Because there was traffic moving at high speed and he didn't want to be paralyzed from the waist down

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Roses are Razzmatazz Violets are Arsenic These colors are weird Cancer.

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Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

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roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

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Why was the man upset? Both sides of his pillow were warm.

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God is real.

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Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Pfft. Stupid. Apples are for healthy people. Go for the ice cream. There's no worms in that.

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a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

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Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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