Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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A man wearing a 'What Would Jesus Do' bracelet and a livestrong bracelet goes up to a blind kid and rubs his eyes and the kid can see. The kid was was not used to the bright lights and wandered into traffic, was hit by a car and killed instantly.

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Why don't meth addicts like food? Because they have not teeth to chew it with.

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red I am High How about you?

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What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

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Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

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Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

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Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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Why was the woman worried? She was coughing up blood

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Why is my phone bill so low this month? Because you have no friends.

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What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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why do leprecon's laugh when they run through the grass? because it tickel's their balls

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How do you make a baby stop crying for the rest of its life? Shoot it in the face.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

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Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

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What's the difference between a prostitute and your mom? Your mom is a well educated lawyer who earns half a million dollar a year while the prostitute sells her own body for an extremely small amount of money.

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What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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