Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

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What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

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how much fish could a chicken

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Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

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Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

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Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered SIX offender

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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What do I hate? people

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Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

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One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops