Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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whats sad about justin bieber getting hit by a car and dying ? I wasnt driving the car that hit him.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 8,9,10, and 11 along with their families.

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Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

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Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

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What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

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What did the Rose Bowl say to the Fiesta Bowl? We crushed the Orange Bowl.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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What is the difference between a jew and girl scouts. Girl scouts come back from camp

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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Q: Whats Worse Than 21 Dead Babies in a Trashbag? A: 1 Dead Baby In 21 Trashbags.

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Why do sharks swim in salt water? Pepper water makes them sneeze! Why do whales swim in salt water? They can't survive in fresh water.

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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A bunch of nuns were riding a three-seat bicycle. The seats were comfy and no one complained.

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why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got hit y a car

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops