What does NASCAR stand for? Non-athletic sport centered around rednecks.

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What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 encountered 7 in the Vietnam War where he killed 6's brothers, leaving him scarred. 6 has countless nightmares due to the numerous visions that reminisce that situation in great deal. Also, 7 had a big hook on his hand, which was very scary.

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A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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Why did the teacher arrive late for class? Because his father had a stroke the night before, and they had to rush to the hospital and because of exhaustion, he missed the bus, and arrived ten minutes late.

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Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship with God.

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A man visits an anti joke site looking for some humor. realizing that its not funny, he closes the window.

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roses are red poo is poo

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What did one tampon say to another? Nothing they were both stuck up.

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The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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What's worse than getting a bruise? AIDS.

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Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

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What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

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Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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