You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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Why did the plane leave late? Because they were out of Kellogg's® Breakfast Cereal.

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What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

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A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

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Why is the boy lying down on the floor? The chandelier fell on him.

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whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

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A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

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What's more annoying than dyslexic jokes? Jokes were peopel spel words rong.

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

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Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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awkies when jamie and jacob hook up, and u have to tell the dog..i maen danni that this has been going on for 2 months

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What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

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If you go to a restaurant and you have more food on your plate then someone who is obese, you KNOW you have too much food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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