Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

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How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

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How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

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why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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what did the hammer do on the test -he nailed it.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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What's worse than leaving the maternity ward with the wrong child? Being a parent.

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womans rights...

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he is quite wealthy.

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why dont they make black forks

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Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

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Why did the bear fall down? I shot it. Why did the second bear fall down? It tripped over the first one.

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Men's rights

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

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Who's gay? Justin Beaver

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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