Matt Gregory Harrington is a bender, pylon, hoser, duster tripod, and puck bunny!!!!

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

Harry to Voldemort: Your mother is so fat, her patronus is a cake!

Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

I contracted AID's from a prostitute So I went out and killed 4 gay since they are the most prominent carriers of the disease I also killed a black man I kill a black man everyday

What is a mean thing to say to Stephen Hawking? Please take a seat.

Mugger: Give me all your money. Victim: No. Mugger: Okay. (Moves on to find his next victim)

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

what happened to those kids sandusky raped? who cares

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

A man with no legs walks into a bar. Just kidding...

A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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