What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

thumb_up thumb_down +24

one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

thumb_up thumb_down +24

We could have had it all Rolling in the deep You have my heart inside of your hand As you've just now inexplicably ripped it out of my ribcage.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

thumb_up thumb_down +22

hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops