A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

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I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why Americans are so bad at League of Legends? Because they can't defend their towers.

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Q: Why was the little girl cowering in a closet in a corner. A: Because there was a murderer/rapist in her house with her oarents gone.

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Dwarf Shortage

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Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Why did Wiggy fall into the toilet? Wiggy was the name of his turd.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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your mama so old, shes dead.

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What's brown and smells like shit? Brown colour. I'm synesthetic.

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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Who's the slut of the alphabet? C.

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A woman walked into a club. Or at least, that's what her abusive boyfriend told the police.

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My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops