How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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What did the rabbit say to the man nothing animals cant talk

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Why was johnny so good at reading? Because he had 3. Toes

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What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

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Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

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how much blondes does it take to fix a light bulb 1 to buy the bulb 2 to put it up and 25 to think about what it does

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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So a black guy goes to college and doesn't steal anything or rape anyone. He has a 4.0 GPA and is one of the smartest students at Harvard University.

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A Polish man walks into a bar and says, "Co za asy..."

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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Go to this website and this game is an antijoke to laugh at http://iamhelenkeller.com/

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Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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hwhy did the monkey fall out of the tree? he got shot. why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? he was nailed to the first one.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

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Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

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"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

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How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

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Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, Knock Who's There? Not Katie.

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops