What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

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What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

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A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

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Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Wanna hear a joke? It's here somewhere You looked :D There ain't jokes on Antijoke.com

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y r black people noses so big??? A= god had to hold tem somehere to spray paint them

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Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

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For Chuck Norris every street is one way his way.

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Every first letter of an innappropriate body part is how it actually looks like: Penis, Vagina, Boobs

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A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

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How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

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Are you from Africa because you sure look likes you've got Ebola

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What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

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What did the flower say to it's friends? I want to kill a Christmas tree.

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A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

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Carlos was on the computer writing anti-jokes. They all scuked.

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I am back with more jokes! -Lets go Mets It is best to dislike this one

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Did you know that if you write "Beatles" on a piece of paper, chop it up, put it in some cabbage soup, eat the soup, poop it out in a cup, and put the paper back together, it spells "Ringo <3 Arby's"?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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